Ahh February as I get older I appreciate this month more and more. Winter is nearly over and Spring is about to unfold. The days are getting lighter and we are coming out of the post Xmas gloom.

Of course here in the Uk we had snow over the last few days which can be quite an entertaining diversion. There's always a new spin on it that comes out. This year for example it was estimated that a billion quid was lost to the economy as a result of the snow fall. See here for more info.  

I don't know about anybody else but I'm getting a little bored with this current obsession with money and the almighty economy. Surely there is more to life than making money?

Another thing. Once upon a time a billion quid seemed a lot of money. Now a days we are paying out several billion quid every other week to bail out some institution or other. 

Apparently the billion quid lost is calculated on 20% of the workforce been off because of the snow. So if everybody was off that would be 5 billion quid. If everybody was off for a week it would cost the economy 25 billion quid! (roughly equivalent to bailing out a middle sized failing bank).

Seems to me that if we all got together it wouldn't take us long to take down the whole system if we put our minds to it. Just think - we all throw a week's worth of sick days. I don't know about you but I can have five days off and self certificate as well. So we wouldn't even need to get doctor's notes! 

Ok so one week (25 billion quid remember) might not be enough. The next Monday we'll all have to be back in work (otherwise we'll need doctor's notes) but after that we could be back out on Tuesday for another 5 days and so on. 

At my work I think you are 'counselled', whatever that might be, after 3 periods of absence. However by then the economy will have lost 75 billion quid. I reckon that will be enough to have them tearing their hair out.

So set the alarm for nine o clock on Monday. Get practicing that croaky voice you always put on when phoning in sick (or do you prefer to get your other half/mum to phone in for you?). Start thinking what you are going to put on your form when you return to work (Personally I'm torn between Bubonic Plague, Leprosy and Bird Flu). And finally of course the big decision - what daytime telly are you going to watch - do you go for the property porn (surely the credit crunch is going to kill this off) or Jeremy Kyle and his daily dissection of some poor chav's private life.

Power to the (poorly) people!!

 

 

 

Blue Snorkel coated punk rocker - the Soundtrack

A Few of My Favourite Things

The Travelling Band live in Haworth

Blue Snorkel Punk Rocker part 2

NME Tour review

Back Issues

Send your comments, articles, insults, poetry, pictures, outpourings of love etc

The Credits